If you haven't read episode 1, click the link below to read it https://dj-fuad.blogspot.com/2019/10/why-god-does-not-have-unconditional-love.html
In this episode, we are going to look at unconditional love from intimate and romantic relationships and how there can never be any relationship based on nothing or any limitations for example, no Mather how selfless your partner may be, that relationship depends on something.
After I published the first episode I received a lot of emails telling me how evidence exist to prove unconditional love. but one particular emails got my attention and I decided to address it in this episode of WHY UNCONDITIONAL LOVE DOES NOT EXIST.
This special email reads, "dear editor, my name is makeba writing to you from East Africa, i have been following your blog since the year 2011 but I have never commented on any of your write-ups but the title and the content of your article has pushed me to respond to your reasons why you think there is no unconditional love.
thousands of people can say unconditional does not exist but not me, my boyfriend is from a patrilinial family where men are highly respected above women especially when the guy is from a royal family and my yet to be husband is a royal from this family where men are not supposed to do certain things for women like washing for a woman and many other things.
secondly my boyfriend is not allowed to marry a girl who is not from a royal family and I am not from any royal family and my boyfriend clearly knows that he risk the opportunity of becoming the next chief when his father is no more but, this guy has decided to be with me damning what his family royalty is demanding from him.
not just that, his father is about to disown him but, he has decided to be with me no-matter what. there are other things this guy is doing just to let the two of us stay together in love and I see this as a great sacrifice which can only be explained by the concept of unconditional love and nothing else.
So Mr./Madam editor i will be happy if you tell me what this love from my boyfriend is if not unconditional love thank you."
First of all I would want to say a very big thank you to Miss Makeba for being a follower of my blog since the year 2011 secondly, thank you for taking the pain to read the first episode of my series.
Now lets take a look at our sister's situation especially what her boyfriend is doing for her which makes her feels like this is an unconditional love shown her. To be sincere with my sister Makeba, what you are experiencing with your royal boyfriend is a typical example of what many would describe as unconditional love because on the surface, it looks like you have done nothing especial for this guy so, you think you don't deserve this great sacrifice from this him.
The above scenario perfectly fit into the unconditional love myth, but as I said in episode 1 of this series, the concept of unconditional love is one many myths in the world that people find it difficult to accept that, these events and experiences do not exist.
Unconditional love is philosophically a man made situation or state of being since we are talking about roman or intimate relationships in this episode and I am not saying this to rubbish or to suggest that there is anything wrong with what human beings have made in this world to support our day to day life.
This world or the universe is a world of dependability thus everything we do depends on something therefore, no one can say they did something without basing it on anything at all.
So our sister Makeba's boyfriend has a beautiful and a shocking reason for loving her to the extent of letting go of his royalty just to be with our sister makeba.
So, in this episode we are going to list couple of thing which push people to sacrifice their life, money, and everything they have to people who have done nothing in return to them.
But before I do that, I would want to create my won definition of unconditional love, which is, "Love or any act of kindness shown towards people without making the intentions behind the act know to the beneficiary".
I came up with this definition because, as I have already explained, any act of love, affection, and kindness has some serious intentions behind them but many a times, the people who engage in this acts of love and kindness consciously or unconsciously hid their intentions for showing the love which makes it very difficult for the beneficiaries to realize or identify the role they played to make someone show them this kind of love.
The following are some of the hidden reasons for people who show the kind of love that others consider as unconditional love
People show love, kindness or affection towards others for many reasons including, Self gratification, Glorification, for Karma or Spiritual purposes, To gain the acceptance of others, To gain favor from others, To help the society which later bring recognition to the fellow, To gain good will from the people, some people also do good or show love just to shame or make someone jealous and most importantly, people show special love to others to gain their love among other things.
The above are just a fraction of some of the reasons why many people do good or show love and kindness and as much as these hidden reasons may expose the myth of unconditional love, these reason are not bad or evil in themselves.
In other words, there is nothing wrong with someone doing good or showing affection with a particular reason behind the act of kindness it is the type of reason or the condition which will defines whether it is good or bad reason or condition.
We need to emphasis on the above point because, the proponents of unconditional love argue that, what makes unconditional love so special is the lack of conditions or the lack of a why factor but, this is a weak argument because, is like saying money is the root of all evil because, people kill because of money while the real cause of the killing is poverty, the lack of money.
In the last episode, I gave the globally accepted definition of unconditional love and I have also given my own philosophical definition of what people mistake to be unconditional love or an affection base on nothing as they say.
Now that we have all the definitions and explanations, it is time to go back to our sister Makeba's reasons for believing or thinking, unconditional love do exit. to refresh our minds on her deep love story, our sister Makeba wrote to me that she strongly believe,
unconditional love do exist because, her boyfriend is currently sacrificing his royalty and about to be disowned by his father meanwhile she the girl has done nothing to this guy to deserve this unqualified sacrifice so she has therefore, concluded by saying,
unconditional love does exist because she is a living testimony.
Before we can determine whether what her boyfriend is doing for her is unconditional love or not, we need to put her case into one of the reasons why her boyfriend is ready to give up virtually everything in exchange for her, what a lucky girl?
Now there could be so many reasons why this guy is showing this true love to this girl who at the moment think she has done nothing in return to her boyfriend and therefore, this love is unconditional.
Well what if this guy is running away from some conditionalities attached to his family's royalty? or just just like the forever loved Princess Diana of the United Kingdom who wanted to live a life of a simple person like a commoner?
A third reason could be, this guy has studied himself and has come to the realization that, this is the woman who can help him achieve his dreams and aspirations as a human being? but the most interesting part is, he has not disclose his real intentions to our dear lady Makeba and it is this lack of intentions which I know our sister may know one day is what is making her think she is experiencing an unconditional love.
Plus, don't forget that most Prince are trained to be alpha-males and no matter how deep in-love an alpha male may be, they need to keep a bit of mystery onto and around themselves, and research has shown that, women in-particular love mystery which is a form of fantasy for them.
So I don't know if Makeba has ever asked his Prince Charming about why he loves her so much and if she has it could be the answer was, my love for you is based on nothing and this can melt the hearts of many women though not all women want a relationship based on nothing.
Now, this is just a hint of why many of us could be dreaming we are experiencing unconditional love or even to think that, this Utopian love or affection do exist.
So the next episode will take a deep look into the various reasons we mostly mistake to be unconditional love and the pros and cons of keeping our intentions for loving some hidden.
Until then, I am asking you my readers to send me your comments, disagreements to my email:evans.tawiah1@gmail.com and on whatsapp number:+233247785986 because if this series can grow from episodes to seasons, it will depend mostly on your feedbacks.
Thank you for reading and don't forget to share to your friends and loved ones.
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